No. I refuse to believe that the Internet would be so heinous as to have things like miniature versions of myself lurking in its midst.
I already have a clone. That thematic quota and “heroic cliché” has been more than satisfied. I do not need another.
Miniature?? You’re the hulking, overgrown ogre here. My genetics are unquestionably perfect.
Besides, when it comes to evidence of your flaws, I need look no further than the company you keep.
No one in their right mind would willingly associate with that harlot.
*irritated* So you’re just going to go without me? I thought you were intent on having company.
*slowly* Well, I had hoped you would come with me so we could go check out the attic. But, if you don’t want to, then I can just go on my own—and we can do something later. I thought you said you had better things to do, anyway!
*reluctantly* What if…what if I agreed to go with you tomorrow?
I know there aren’t! Ghosts and monsters don’t exist, and if they did, I’d kill them anyway, assuming they aren’t included in my father’s rules. I’ve been up there before.
Oho, I’d beg to differ with you, Little Wing—I’ve fought monsters before. Not in this attic, maybe, but monsters all the same. Clearly you are lucky to have me and my expertise on your side.
You have? All right, so what’s the deal, then? Why don’t you want to go up there?
*he is silent, mind racing* What if we go tomorrow?
*totally not backing down* All right, it’s one thing if you don’t wanna go up there, but why don’t you want me to go up there?
*looking down at Damian suspiciously* What’s up there?*wrinkling his nose* Nothing. My father’s old things. Dust. Let’s just go tomorrow.
*completely unconvinced*
Alfred’s gonna be cleaning tomorrow. Why can’t I just go on my own today? You don’t even have to come.But tomorrow would be significantly more convenient.
*raising an eyebrow* And why is that?
I….I have things to do today. Important things.
*shrugging* Okay then—I’m going on my own. *heading back off down the hallway again*
*catching the back of Dick’s shirt* No…wait…
*stopping, looking amused*
Okay, I’m listening.
What’s in the attic, Little Wing.*he opens his mouth, but loses his nerve and closes it again* None of your business.
*still looking amused* Well, then I’m going. You can go….train, or whatever ‘important business’ you had. Don’t worry about it—I’ll catch up with you later, hm?
*irritated* So you’re just going to go without me? I thought you were intent on having company.
I know there aren’t! Ghosts and monsters don’t exist, and if they did, I’d kill them anyway, assuming they aren’t included in my father’s rules. I’ve been up there before.
Oho, I’d beg to differ with you, Little Wing—I’ve fought monsters before. Not in this attic, maybe, but monsters all the same. Clearly you are lucky to have me and my expertise on your side.
You have? All right, so what’s the deal, then? Why don’t you want to go up there?
*he is silent, mind racing* What if we go tomorrow?
*totally not backing down* All right, it’s one thing if you don’t wanna go up there, but why don’t you want me to go up there?
*looking down at Damian suspiciously* What’s up there?*wrinkling his nose* Nothing. My father’s old things. Dust. Let’s just go tomorrow.
*completely unconvinced*
Alfred’s gonna be cleaning tomorrow. Why can’t I just go on my own today? You don’t even have to come.But tomorrow would be significantly more convenient.
*raising an eyebrow* And why is that?
I….I have things to do today. Important things.
*shrugging* Okay then—I’m going on my own. *heading back off down the hallway again*
*catching the back of Dick’s shirt* No…wait…
*stopping, looking amused*
Okay, I’m listening.
What’s in the attic, Little Wing.
*he opens his mouth, but loses his nerve and closes it again* None of your business.
I know there aren’t! Ghosts and monsters don’t exist, and if they did, I’d kill them anyway, assuming they aren’t included in my father’s rules. I’ve been up there before.
Oho, I’d beg to differ with you, Little Wing—I’ve fought monsters before. Not in this attic, maybe, but monsters all the same. Clearly you are lucky to have me and my expertise on your side.
You have? All right, so what’s the deal, then? Why don’t you want to go up there?
*he is silent, mind racing* What if we go tomorrow?
*totally not backing down* All right, it’s one thing if you don’t wanna go up there, but why don’t you want me to go up there?
*looking down at Damian suspiciously* What’s up there?*wrinkling his nose* Nothing. My father’s old things. Dust. Let’s just go tomorrow.
*completely unconvinced*
Alfred’s gonna be cleaning tomorrow. Why can’t I just go on my own today? You don’t even have to come.But tomorrow would be significantly more convenient.
*raising an eyebrow* And why is that?
I….I have things to do today. Important things.
*shrugging* Okay then—I’m going on my own. *heading back off down the hallway again*
*catching the back of Dick’s shirt* No…wait…
I know there aren’t! Ghosts and monsters don’t exist, and if they did, I’d kill them anyway, assuming they aren’t included in my father’s rules. I’ve been up there before.
Oho, I’d beg to differ with you, Little Wing—I’ve fought monsters before. Not in this attic, maybe, but monsters all the same. Clearly you are lucky to have me and my expertise on your side.
You have? All right, so what’s the deal, then? Why don’t you want to go up there?
*he is silent, mind racing* What if we go tomorrow?
*totally not backing down* All right, it’s one thing if you don’t wanna go up there, but why don’t you want me to go up there?
*looking down at Damian suspiciously* What’s up there?*wrinkling his nose* Nothing. My father’s old things. Dust. Let’s just go tomorrow.
*completely unconvinced*
Alfred’s gonna be cleaning tomorrow. Why can’t I just go on my own today? You don’t even have to come.But tomorrow would be significantly more convenient.
*raising an eyebrow* And why is that?
I….I have things to do today. Important things.
I know there aren’t! Ghosts and monsters don’t exist, and if they did, I’d kill them anyway, assuming they aren’t included in my father’s rules. I’ve been up there before.
Oho, I’d beg to differ with you, Little Wing—I’ve fought monsters before. Not in this attic, maybe, but monsters all the same. Clearly you are lucky to have me and my expertise on your side.
You have? All right, so what’s the deal, then? Why don’t you want to go up there?
*he is silent, mind racing* What if we go tomorrow?
*totally not backing down* All right, it’s one thing if you don’t wanna go up there, but why don’t you want me to go up there?
*looking down at Damian suspiciously* What’s up there?*wrinkling his nose* Nothing. My father’s old things. Dust. Let’s just go tomorrow.
*completely unconvinced*
Alfred’s gonna be cleaning tomorrow. Why can’t I just go on my own today? You don’t even have to come.
But tomorrow would be significantly more convenient.
I know there aren’t! Ghosts and monsters don’t exist, and if they did, I’d kill them anyway, assuming they aren’t included in my father’s rules. I’ve been up there before.
Oho, I’d beg to differ with you, Little Wing—I’ve fought monsters before. Not in this attic, maybe, but monsters all the same. Clearly you are lucky to have me and my expertise on your side.
You have? All right, so what’s the deal, then? Why don’t you want to go up there?
*he is silent, mind racing* What if we go tomorrow?
*totally not backing down* All right, it’s one thing if you don’t wanna go up there, but why don’t you want me to go up there?
*looking down at Damian suspiciously* What’s up there?
*wrinkling his nose* Nothing. My father’s old things. Dust. Let’s just go tomorrow.
I know there aren’t! Ghosts and monsters don’t exist, and if they did, I’d kill them anyway, assuming they aren’t included in my father’s rules. I’ve been up there before.
Oho, I’d beg to differ with you, Little Wing—I’ve fought monsters before. Not in this attic, maybe, but monsters all the same. Clearly you are lucky to have me and my expertise on your side.
You have? All right, so what’s the deal, then? Why don’t you want to go up there?
*he is silent, mind racing* What if we go tomorrow?
dickrobatics replied to your post: The attic??
No, today’s opposite day and I meant the batcave. Yes, the attic! What’s that look for? Are you coming or am I going through the stuff on my own?Why not the cave? Let’s…we could organize the weaponry. That sounds like a better use of our time.
The weaponry is always organized. You’re the one who’s always organizing it!
What’s up, Little Wing? Why don’t you want to come with me? Either we do this now or Alfie’s probably just gonna throw everything out. I wanted to see if Bruce had stuffed anything cool up there!I just don’t see why we couldn’t organize some of the back rooms. I’m sure there’s nothing useful in the attic or it wouldn’t be there.
It doesn’t have to be useful to be cool, Damian.
*shrugs*I’m gonna go by myself then.*dismayed, he follows after* but…but nobody uses the attic for anything.
*looking back, raising an eyebrow at him* So what’s the problem with going up there? Bruce’s stuffed old stuff up there for years. It’s like…the storage for stuff that gets old in storage.
There just seem like so many more useful places and things we could investigate. Who cares about my father’s old things?
I do! You’ve seen some of the cool stuff he’s got, remember the library? I bet there’s more armor in the attic. Oh man, I bet he’s got all kinds of cool books and stuff stashed up there…
Why don’t you want to go explore? *he stops suddenly, turning to face Damian in the hallway, looking actually concerned*
Damian…you’re not afraid of the attic, are you?What? How dare you! Of course I’m not afraid of the attic.
…Soo…what’s the problem then?
Maybe I just feel like exploring the library today instead.
Oh come on Dami we can do that any day! Alfie’s gonna clean the library out probably tomorrow—why don’t you want to come with me?
Why are you so intent on going to the attic?
…You’re taking us in circles here, Damian. You know why I wanna go up, but you still haven’t told me why you don’t want to go up. *teasing, waggling his fingers at him dramatically* there aren’t any ghosts up there, or monsters~
I know there aren’t! Ghosts and monsters don’t exist, and if they did, I’d kill them anyway, assuming they aren’t included in my father’s rules. I’ve been up there before.
